The Christmas Conspiracy
Parents around the world conspire to commit psychological warfare upon unsuspecting Children. The claimed goal is to induce a state of joy with gifts from "Santa Claus". Many Kindergarteners trying to expose the truth among friends are deemed, "tinfoil hat conspiracy theorists". After all, they're claiming that ALL ADULTS are participating in a world wide conspiracy just to deceive them about the source of presents.
"Why would they ALL lie to us?", says the bluepilled gradeschooler, "That's crazy! Moms or Dads, maybe, but Grannies wouldn't lie."
A curious fence-sitter pipes up, "I saw Santa and sat on his lap. Wouldn't parents want us to love them instead of a Santa stranger?"
"Shh, never tell them you don't believe in Santa or the presents will stop coming", whispers the most redpilled child.
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FemaleVet4Trump ago
My kid found out the truth about Santa this year. She hoped that I lied to her about it and that Santa was real. :/
PolybiusPizza ago
The way to tell her the truth, parents decided to uphold the tradition of giving gifts to those in jeed by followinf the example of St. Nicholas, a real person who slapped Arius at the Council of Nycaea for being a heretic. St. Nick was and is a badass.