How does one set out to convert fiat cash into recious metals safely? I checked around the local dealerships and half of them unironically end in -Stein. The last I want is for them sending my receipts behind my back to nigger collection squads. I have some money in metals ETFs, but I know they'll be as worthless as the paper I exchanged for them when everything goes to shit.

Of course canned foods will be worth more in such a situation, so maybe I should get a manageably small amount, one that isn't worth risking a bullet stealing, but enough to bribe whoever still cares once a SHTF situation skyrockets its value.