I work more than I'd like to. Between that, cooking, and going to the gym, I don't have a lot of time to do anything else. I like to spend that free time that I do have reading. I hate TV and movies, as I'm sure most of you do. I don't like to drink or anything like that -- intoxication is the trading of power for the illusion of power. I'm not a people person, in case you couldn't tell. I have no social life.

I don't really have anyone in my life. Nobody to talk to. No friends. Nothing. I hardly have contact with my family. I'm desperate for human interaction to the point that I sometimes resort to going shopping for the sole purpose of being around other humans. And I almost invariably walk around alone, saying nothing. What could I say to all of these normal people who seem to have better things to be doing? Do I even have anything in common with these types anymore? What could I possibly hope to achieve from the interaction?

I want people in my life, but I can't envision a world in which I have them. I don't do things that involve other people. I can't help but view typical socializing as a group of people getting together and wasting time. I find smiling to be a chore, I'm pessimistic in a lot of ways, and I have a tendency to be disagreeable, lest I see myself become a fraud. Were I to take the place of anyone else, I would surely find my previous self off-putting.

I don't meet anyone. I don't really know how I'd go about that. It seems like most people meet new people through their existing social connections or through work (my place of work is pozzed). What's an island to do? Should I even make a friend by some miracle, I can't help but think that my lack of social connections would seem very alarming and my lack of social practice would make me seem much too weird.

Nowhere feels like home to me. Is there a way to get over the longing for company? For fitting in?