You were dealt a very bad hand. Any of us could have been in your shoes had we been born into a den of lunatics. It's pure chance, not predestination. You did not deserve this, you should always know that. You deserve to be loved and you deserve to love yourself. If I were you I'd get a new identity so I didn't have to a live like a nomad. Thank you for telling your story. It doesn't own you, don't forget that.