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Kwijibo ago

tortillas flown in from Mexico the previous day

You can't get tortillas in the D.C. area? tortillas = little mexican girls (or boys)?

EDIT: One more strange note. Who has a cookout in D.C. in December? Also who has a party 3 days after Christmas?

pizzaequalspedo ago

This was my first thought. Even if this isn't pizza/pedo related, why on earth are people in DC obsessed with flying in food from Chicago, Mexico, etc?

I guess when you're spending OPM, it doesn't matter the cost.