It started sometime around early grade school for me. I had an issue with the one size fits all authoritative figures that called themselves teachers. Everyone just did what they were told without question while I resented and ultimately resisted it. I couldn't articulate my feelings of this until about age 17/18 but I always knew we were not getting the whole picture. Then 9/11 happened and the red flags went up and I started becoming more self conscious to my surroundings. Now that I've reached the event horizon there is not much else to do except watch the world tear itself apart by its own hand. I'll spread happiness wherever I walk but deep down I'll know the truth. And the truth is we'll not know what we have until it is all but ashes. My soul will roam the universe one day tho, so that's a plus. I wanna see the crab nebula.